either the husband or wife do within the marriage, day after day? Surprise one another by looking for some need in your marriage. Don't worry that you won't find something that your wife or husband needs. There are many needs, too often left unfulfilled. Then fill that need without expecting anything in return. You'll be amazed how this will revitalize the love and respect your mate has for you.

Be your husband's or wife's defender. Wives or husbands, have you ever been in a group where some person says something insensitive about your mate? If that happens, what do you do? It is very important to protect your mate in the company of others, and even more so in his or her absence. This will get around, and you will also set a good example for other couples.

Remember to do the little things. It's easy to do big things for others, like buy an expensive gift for your wife or husband, take him or her out for an expensive dinner or splurge on an expensive entertainment outing. But what about the little things in life, like listening to your mate to find out the little things he or she would like you to do? Your wife may want you to clean off your shoes before coming into the house. Your husband may want you to not remind him over and over of things that he does already. Think about the little things that can be improved in your marriage and try your best to do them. Make a list so you don't forget them. Sit down at the kitchen table and ask each other some of the little things the other would like you to do. Discuss them calmly and peacefully, remembering that you are both dedicating yourselves to the happiness of your mate. The little things do mean a lot.

A marriage made in heaven? One thing every married couple should understand: A marriage is not naturally "made in heaven," with everything going perfectly. In fact, it's impossible to enjoy a perfect marriage here on earth if one doesn't understand human nature and what kind of help is needed to "perfect" a marriage. Since God instituted marriage, and He is the help that all married couples need to have a happy marriage, it follows that only God's instruction can help "perfect" a marriage. Human nature is the greatest natural deterrent to what could otherwise be a happy marriage. All husbands and wives have human nature. Human nature is just that: It is the nature of human beings, acquired from Satan, the unseen ruler of this world, and other human beings under his influence.

Human nature is not of God. And human nature never goes away in this life. Of itself it is selfish and often becomes even more so as it absorbs and acquires the selfishness of the world around it. When human beings are born, they are born with a "clean slate." But as we age, we increasingly take on the characteristics of the Satan-led world around us, a world that's primarily built on selfishness and self-interest. This inevitably leads to conflict as people's self-interests collide-particularly when people are in such a close relationship and partnership as marriage. It's important to know about human nature and its ability to erode what otherwise could and should be a happy marriage. The Bible tells us that we can overcome our human nature by doing good or godly things toward others (Romans 12:21). This is what Jesus Christ was and is all about. Happiness comes from giving. A seldom-understood truth is that it is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35)-and nowhere is this more crucial than in marriage.

Finally, all married couples (and those contemplating marriage), should know and understand that the emotional high of love that a man and woman feel for each other during the wedding ceremony will moderate as time passes. With a little understanding about how a marriage can work better, the "I dos" that both parties agreed to originally can overcome the "I don'ts" that will surely and inadvertently surface later in the marriage. Your marriage can be strengthened, improved and revitalized. Choose now to serve one another across the board, and you can have a happier marriage than you ever imagined. May God bless you with a very long and happy marriage<<<<Back<<<<